They're here! The Emmy Awards are here! I know you can't all find the
interest time to watch, so I'm back with my Emmy Award play-by-play so that you can read all about the exciting things that you
didn't missed.
And now, it's on with the show!
5:00 Jimmy Fallon in a video, pulls up in a Smart Car, greets the Glee cast.
5:02 Glee cast says they aren't going because the tickets are, like, $300. Oops, $1200.
5:03 Behold! A Regional final with a grand prize of $1205. Tina Fey's going to join the Glee Club.
5:04 Kate Gosselin wants to be in the Glee Club but, oops! Too many people. So they grab Jon Hamm instead. But he's dancing with his coach, Betty White. And they're not doing the Tango...
5:05 Jane Lynch throws a Slurpee on Jimmy...and on Tina. She wants to be in the Glee Club too.
5:06 And now they're dancing to Born to Run. Hey! That's Jorge Garcia! And Joel McHale!
5:06 I love Jorge Garcia. Someone get him a new TV show. Stat!
5:06 Tim Gunn fixes up Jimmy's outfit. "Make it work!"
5:07 And now he's on stage with his guitar. Have I ever mentioned that I love Jimmy Fallon? Duet with Randy Jackson!
5:08 I'm pretty sure he was trying to match wits with Neil Patrick Harris. Which, of course, he didn't quite make it. But still awesome. Wait! How did he end up in a tuxedo??
(Had to back it up because I was confused. Someone ran out and threw a tuxedo shirt and jacket on him. Still rocking the jeans, though.)
5:09 And now it's Jimmy and his guitar. I really love when he plays the guitar. It almost always means hilarity. Like this joke about Conan and doing shows on NBC.
5:10 Comedy montage:
30 Rock, The Office, Modern Family, Glee, Community, Monk, Parks and Recreation, Nurse Jackie, New Adventures of Old Christine, How I Met Your Mother, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Big Bang Theory.
5:12 First award, presenters: Jon Hamm and Betty White. Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy.
5:13 And the award goes to: Eric Stonestreet,
Modern Family. I think he's gonna cry. First nomination and first win. He didn't cry, but his mom sure did.
5:18 Color Commenter introduces himself. I missed his name but it's the PC dude. He's funny.
5:19 Jimmy shares some of the Tweets for introducing presenters.
5:19 Jim Parsons and Sophia whatsherface from
Modern Family. Jim Parsons is looking a little too skinny. What's up with him?
5:21 Comedy Series Writing win goes to Steve Levitan and Christopher Lloyd. Steve is accepting the award. I think it's going to be a big night for
Modern Family..."A big thanks to our wives without whom we'd...probably be dating around a lot. I mean, we just won an Emmy. That's a pretty good opening line."
5:23 Steven Colbert is here to present Outstanding Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series.
5:24 PleasebeJaneLynch, pleasebeJaneLynch, pleasebeJaneLynch. JANE LYNCH FROM
GLEE!
5:28 Jimmy just did this crazy word association thing to introduce Lauren Graham and Matthew Perry. Their joke isn't really working. Oh, good, Matthew knows it, too.
5:29 Guest Actress in a Comedy Series...Could Jane Lynch get a second Emmy? I'm thinking it's Betty White for
SNL. Oh, they're introducing Guest Actor in a Comedy, too.
5:30 Betty White,
SNL and Neil Patrick Harris for
Glee! They must have already received them since they aren't going on stage.
5:31 And Matthew and Lauren are also introducing Outstanding Director in a Comedy. Ryan Murphy for
Glee. He didn't already get his award. He's going to the stage.
5:32 Ryan Murphy dedicates his award to all his art teachers.
5:33 Funny
Modern Family video. Actually, it's a pretty hilarious
Modern Family video about how to ramp up the funny. I'm going to have to find this. I love when George Clooney randomly shows up in guest spots.
5:36 Eva Longoria-Parker and LL Cool J are presenting Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series. I'd love to see Jim Parsons win for
The Big Bang Theory, but I just don't know...Actually, he deserves it most.
5:37 JIM PARSONS WINS!!! I am SO shocked and happy for him!!!
5:38 He still looks too skinny and way too made up. What's up with his eyebrows?
(I have to pause this to go tell my roommate he won. She's gonna be psyched!)
5:40 Aaaand, we're back. Neil Patrick Harris. I heart him.
5:41 Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series...Anyone but Julia Louis-Dreyfus. She bugs the crap outta me.
5:42 Edie Falco for
Nurse Jackie. I've never seen single episode. Should I check it out? I had no idea that was supposed to be a comedy.
5:43 Jimmy is back with his guitar. And some girl I don't recognize even though I probably should.
5:44 Reality Series montage.
Mythbusters, Wipeout, Biggest Loser, America's Got Talent, Hell's Kitchen, that Jerry Seinfeld Marriage Show, T
he Bachelor, Kardashians, Celebrity Rehab, Deadliest Catch, Dancing with the Stars, Jersey Shore, Amazing Race, Top Chef, American Idol...gosh there are a LOT of reality shows...
5:49 Will Arnett and Keri Russell to present Outstanding Reality Competition Program. What are the odds that
Amazing Race is going to win AGAIN?
5:52 Wow!
Top Chef. Hahaha! Someone totally just tripped! I really like
Top Chef. Why don't I watch it anymore? Oh, yeah, because there's too much freakin stuff on TV these days.
5:56 Introducing the accountants from Ernst and Young, who count the ballots.
5:57 Jimmy Fallon back to sing and play slap Julianna Margulies. Time for a Drama montage.
24, Burn Notice, Grey's Anatomy, CSI: Universe, Dexter!, Law and Order, Criminal Minds, Mad Men (the cheers make me think that might win again),
House, Friday Night Lights, The Good Wife, True Blood, NCIS, Damages, Breaking Bad, LOST! (Okay, I'm a dork and the five seconds of
LOST they just showed made me tear up. I need help.)
6:00 Mariska Hargitay and Christopher Maloney from
Law & Order SVU present the award for Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series.
6:02 Matthew Weiner and Erin Levy for
Mad Men. I've never watched the show, but I really think Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof got SO ROBBED.
6:04 Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama, still Mariska and Christopher presenting...If it's not Terry O'Quinn or Michael Emerson, I'm gonna be ticked. It's probably not gonna be...
6:05 Aaron Paul for
Breaking Bad. Did the voters even SEE the last season of
LOST??
6:10 Jimmy's reading more Tweets. Yay! Emily Deschanel and Nathan Fillion! Presenting Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series. Am I the only one that thinks it's the same nominees as last year? Hello? What about some love for
V? Or
Fringe?
6:11 Archie Panjabi from
The Good Wife. Okay, so she wasn't nominated last year, but still.
6:12 Edie Falco is back to present Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series. I can't tell you how bad I want Matthew Fox to win. It's not gonna be him, but it SHOULD be. It's gonna be Bryan Cranston. I really need to get
Breaking Bad from Netflix...
6:13 Bryan Cranston for
Breaking Bad. Didn't see that one coming...
6:14 Makes a very accurate statement about how each of his fellow nominees was totally robbed. Matthew Fox never got any love for
LOST and he was pretty darn awesome. Maybe his next show...
6:19 Okay, it's commercials now and they're showing a commercial for
Undercovers, the new show starting this fall. Who is that guy? He's hot!
6:19 Oh, that couple from
Undercovers is presenting Outstanding Guest Actress and Guest Actor in a Drama.
6:20 I'm guessing John Lithgow...I was right! And Ann Margaret, but I missed what she was in.
6:21 Ann Margaret and John Lithgow present the award for Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series. Please let Jack Bender win! (No, I know it's not gonna happen.
LOST is 0 for 4 so far. I think it's going to stay that way.)
6:22 Winner is Steve Shill for
Dexter. I love
Dexter a lot, but really?
LOST is now 0 for 5? Come on. Yes, the end was controversial, but that doesn't change the fact that it was really well-written and REALLY well acted this year.
6:23 Jimmy is dressed up as Elton John, at a pink piano, singing a farewell to
24, Law & Order, and
LOST, which all ended their runs this year.
24 is to the tune of "Good Bye, Norma Jean." Oh, now he's dressed up like...uh...Boyz 2 Men? and singing to the tune of some song I don't recognize for
Law & Order. And now
LOST. He's playing his guitar, dressed like Billy Joe Armstrong and singing to "Time of Your Life."
6:30 Is this show really only half over? It feels like almost all the awards I care about have already been announced. Weird.
6:31 Matthew Morrison and Tina Fey to present Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama. I think this year it's going to either January Jones or Juliana Margulies.
6:32 I am SO happy to be wrong!! Go Kyra Sedgwick!
The Closer is my favorite summertime show! She's just delightful. Her husband seriously needs to do a guest spot. I'd love to see her interrogate him.
6:34 Jimmy and his guitar are back with Stephen Colbert.
6:35 Montage of Variety shows.
SNL with Betty White, Late Night with David Letterman, Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Fallon, The Daily Show, Jay Leno, the Tonys, the Grammys, Wanda Sykes, Stephen Colbert, Academy Awards, the Olympics, Hope for Haiti, Christmas at Rockefeller Center, New Year's Rockin Eve.
6:37 Joel McHale and Jeff Probst are presenting Outstanding Writing for a Variety, Comedy or Music Show.
6:39 The Emmy goes to the 63rd Annual Tony Awards. It's kind of fun that those are televised now. I'd probably care more if I lived in New York and could actually SEE some of the shows and the nominees. I saw one Broadway play. It wasn't even a musical, but it was pretty awesome. Mostly because Patrick Wilson was in it.
6:41 These
Community commercials are cracking me up! I can't wait for the new season to start!
6:45 Ricky Gervais. I don't know. He's funny, but I don't find him as hilarious as most people do. He's making jokes about the alcohol at the Golden Globes, and how there's no drinking at the Emmys. I'm pretty sure he's drunk. At least a little.
6:47 He really needs to shut up now. Okay, the Jewish joke was funny. And now he's passing out beers.
6:48 Oh, he's here to present an award. I was starting to wonder. Outstanding Director in a Variety, Comedy or Music Show.
6:49 Bucky Gunts for directing the broadcast of the Olympics Opening Ceremony.
6:51 Ricky Gervais needs to GET OFF THE STAGE. Now he's presenting Outstanding Variety, Comedy or Music Show. I would really love it if
Betty White's SNL or Conan O'Brien's
Tonight Show win. Just because.
6:53
The Daily Show? What? I mean, it's funny, but hello! Betty White's SNL episode was freakin genius. And what better way to stick it to NBC than to give Conan the Emmy?
6:59 Bob Hope Humanitarian Award this year goes to George Clooney. I think it's kind of sweet that he's being presented by Juliana Margulies. I don't agree with George's politics most of the time, but I sure do like him.
7:01 Standing ovation. He's so pretty in a tux. Nice speech. I'm waiting for him to blame Bush for something, but nope. Way to keep it classy, Clooney!
7:04 Miniseries and Movie montage:
The Special Relationship, Endgame, Temple Grandin, Moonshot, You Don't Know Jack, Georgia O'Keefe, The Pacific, Return to Cranford. When the heck were these movies on? Some of them look really good.
7:06 January Jones and John Krazinski present Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie.
7:07 Julia Ormand for
Temple Grandin. I bet anything Claire Danes is going to win for Best Actress. I like Julia Ormand and her really rambly acceptance speech. This is why actors rely on writers...
7:09 She just said some weird thing about mothering and guts and balls. I'm confused.
7:12 Ooh, another
Community commercial. Now I want ice cream...
7:14 Claire Danes (who's going to win an Emmy in a few minutes, probably) is presenting Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or Movie. My guess? David Straithairn.
7:15 Right again! But I only guessed cuz he's in
Temple Gardin, which is pretty much winning everything. Maybe I should check Netflix for that one.
7:16 Huh. Temple Grandin is a real person and she's here tonight. She seems so sweet. Apparently she has autism? I guess that's what the movie's about.
7:17 And with no introduction, it's Jewel. Singing a song she wrote for a friend with cancer. Oh, it's the In Memoriam part.
7:18 Every year I recognize more names. This year, I know almost all of them. Am I getting old? Or just more familiar?
7:21 Jewel's song is beautiful and heartbreaking.
7:22 It's a commercial break, so I'm looking up
Temple Grandin on Netflix. It's about a woman with autism who has dedicated herself to education and the study of animal behavior. Quite frankly, it sounds a little boring. But what the heck? I'll add it to my queue and give it a shot.
7:25 Jimmy thanks Jewel for her performance of "Shape of You." Did I hear that title right? If not, someone please correct me.
7:25 Maura Tierney and Blaire Underwood to present Outstanding Writer for a Miniseries or TV Movie.
7:26 Adam Mazer for
You Don't Know Jack. That's a surprise. Jack Kevorkian over Temple Grandin?
7:27 Favorite quote so far: "Jack Kevorkian, I'm grateful you're my friend. I'm even more grateful you're not my physician."
7:27 Outstanding Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie. Claire Danes, anyone?
7:28 Claire Danes! I think I like her dress. And a very nice speech.
7:34 Anna Paquin, Alexander Skarsgard and that other guy. Outstanding Director for a Miniseries or Movie. Uh, is there any point in going through the nominees, really?
7:35 Mick Jackson,
Temple Grandin.
7:36 Nice speech, pretty much all directed at Temple Grandin.
7:38 Outstanding Lead Actor in a Miniseries or Movie. Al Pacino,
You Don't Know Jack. He really should stick to TV movies because that's where he actually has decent roles and performances. Unlike his more recent movies. Seriously.
7:39 He's so awkward without a script. Even moreso than Julia Ormand.
7:40 Yeah, he's still talking. And it's still awkward.
7:41 They just pointed out Jack Kevorkian. He looks like a corpse.
7:42 Commercial time. I kind of want to watch
The Event, but I don't know. Is this going to be just another awesome show that sucks me in and gets cancelled right away? Maybe I'll wait and see before I let myself get hooked. I can't take another
Firefly/Pushing Daisies/Jericho/FlashForward disappointment.
7:46 Laurence Fishburne to present Outstanding Miniseries. Only two nominees? Winner, The Pacific.
7:47 Accepting the award: Tom Hanks.
7:47 Outstanding Made for Television Movie (am I the only one that thinks that wording is weird? How about "Outstanding Movie Made for Television?")
7:48 Winner is
Temple Grandin. What a shock! But not near as shocking as this woman's boobs. She needs to cover those things up! Aw, Temple Grandin is on the stage with them. It's her birthday, how cute.
7:50 Tom Selleck gets to present Outstanding Drama Series. Congrats to
LOST, which is about to go 0 for 7 tonight.
7:51
Mad Men. I have zero interest in this show. I really don't think I'd like it.
Dexter? Awesome.
Breaking Bad? Probably gonna love it.
Mad Men? No thanks.
7:56 Ted Danson gets to present the final award for the night: Outstanding Comedy Series. Please NOT
30 Rock again. It's funny and all, but come on.
7:57
Modern Family! I'm actually kind of shocked it's not
Glee, but glad to see something that's also deserving!
7:59 And the show's over. I thought there were a couple of kind of surprises, but, as usual, nothing shocking. I'm glad
Modern Family got some recognition. I don't watch it regularly, but it's one of the few shows that actually makes me laugh out loud when I'm all by myself. I should watch it more often. I'm still not convinced about
Mad Men, though...
So, what did you all think? Any surprises? Any winners you were particularly thrilled about? And, more importantly, who do YOU think got robbed?