Ahem. Before I get started, I just have to clear something up. I was a little bit surprised by some of the comments I got on Monday's post. Until I went back and reread Monday's post and realized that I really did no justice to the poor guy that so kindly took me out on Saturday. He was exceptionally nice and the evening was not terrible. He was a little awkward and yes, he talked about his truck a lot, but I really think that's got more to do with his social skills than with any sort of male ego. Just wanted to make sure we got that understood.
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Dating. At some point in our lives, almost all of us have done it at least once.
And dating is fraught with all sorts of little secrets, which means plenty of fun little confessions!
Here's mine.
Sometimes, I'm not very nice.
In my dating-age life, there's been a recurring theme. I've been interested in a lot of different guys. And a couple of guys have actually (for obvious reasons) been interested in me.
The problem is, that almost never happens simultaneously.
Now, my solution to the unrequited crush is to become friends with the object of my affections. I learned in high school that friendship is better than just staring longingly (and rather pathetically) across the room while pretending to be talking to someone else.
Unfortunately, I haven't been so courteous when the situation is reversed.
In eleventh grade, there was this boy named Josh. I knew there was something off about him, and I heard some disturbing rumors that offered a possible explanation for the creepiness I felt whenever he got too near. He was tall and thin, but wore these over-sized button-up shirts and had hair that frequently went days without making the acquaintance of anything resembling shampoo.
We had a class together and Josh immediately took notice of me. At first, I didn't mind. Until it started to get a little uncomfortable. Then, I met his attentions with silence. I ignored him in the hallways, I barely spoke to him when we were paired together in lab assignments. I was horrible. And all over some unconfirmed rumors and questionable hygiene.
I broke up with a boyfriend right before I moved to Utah. Within a few months, I met Travis at work. At first, I sort of liked Travis, although I wasn't interested in dating him. Having only recently ended my first "grown up" relationship and harboring a mad crush on a really cute guy at church, I kept Travis at a distance for as long as I could. It's true, he turned a little stalkerish, but I handled that whole situation badly and started ignoring him to get him to leave me alone.
And then there was Bill.
Now, in my defense, there was something seriously wrong with Bill. Several things, actually. I did go out with him once, reluctantly, just to be nice and to silence a well-intentioned home teacher. But after that one date, I avoided Bill like the plague. He would try to talk to me and I literally walked away. He worked in the Admissions Office on campus. I would see him on my way through the building and quickly turn my head.
It's terrible. If I'm not interested in a guy that I know likes me, I ignore him until he goes away. Time and time again.
I so deserve to be single.
And now it's your turn! Grab the button above, link up down below and spill your juiciest dating confessions!
13 comments:
I had a girl ignore me after we'd sort of gone together.
The worst part of it was that we were on a date at the time. She took up with the guy of the pair that we were out with. That pair were just friends and I sat with the girl and waited for the evening to end when I felt like just walking out and being done with it.
It's hard to actually meet someone where the affection is mutual. Even with Adam, I know he was more into me initially, and then it all evened out.
Oh my gosh! I have to write a response post to this on Cheap Wine and Cookies! I will be so happy if I have time today!
MacGyver once called me a "sexual predator" before he and I became serious because I was just straight up cruel to guys. And to this day, I fell very little guilt about it. I'll be sure to McLinky if I'm able to find the time to throw this post up.
Fun.
OH MY GOSH... I did some CRAZY things to poor guys when I was single and dating. I think the craziest but most necessary was when I went on my last ever blind date. I need to explain... this kid came and picked me up and when we got to the end of my street he said "So what do you want to do?" He didn't even plan anything. Then he said "I only have like 20 bucks so whatever it is it can't be expensive unless you want to chip in." We decided to go get some food. When we got the restaurant I put his last name down and he said "Woah! Taking my last name already huh? I can dig it." I excused myself to the bathroom where I called my mom and told her to call me in about 10 minutes to tell me I needed to come home. When she called I used my best acting skills and actually started CRYING while she was laughing on the other side saying blah blah blah. I told my date that my brother got in a car accident and I needed to get home. He took me home and I jumped out of the car without saying goodbye. He shouted back at me "I'll call you later babe! And I'll take a rain check on my good night kiss." GROSS. Can you blame me?
That was the last time I went on a blind date. I HATED dating. I’m so glad to be married!
My dating days were so long ago, I can't even remember. :)
This sounds a lot like something I would do. I totally have walked away from men all the time. I don't care that there talking to me.
How I wish it were easy if the attraction was always mutual.
I didn't really date. Thanks for clarifying on the NOT ME dating post. I thought you hated it. I'll understand when I'm not invited to the wedding!
I wouldn't say you deserve to be single. You deserve to not date psychotic guys maybe? I don't know why men can be so dense when a woman is clearly not interested. I've specifically had to say, "I don't want to see you or speak to you again," and had them STILL call again.
I don't think you deserve to be single and it's not like being single is a bad thing! I handled situations like you described the same way...it's not like there are handbooks out there for us to know how to deal with this kind of stuff! :-) don't be so hard on yourself!
I don't fall in "like" very easily - so that can create problems. But I HATE when people say that I am picky! Am I picky because I want my significant other to have a job and be able to support himself??
:)
I gave dudes a month to give them the benefit of the doubt, then I moved on.
I finally wrote down every single thing I wanted and liked in a man. Wouldn't you know 1/2 year later there they were.
Well, it sounds like your date was pretty bad, but I still think light saber boy trumps autistic boy. :)
Head on over to my blog..there's a fancy little award there to celebrate your fabulousness!
Like I've already said, I have so many years of dating stories to mine, I'll be able to stay in print FOREVER.
But I got over feeling bad for guys. You know what happens when you're nice to those types? They will manipulate you and play on your pity until you're ready to lose your mind. They KNOW it's just a matter of time; they'll squeeze every second out of you in the mean time. I learned to be polite but firm. I'm all about boundaries, baby. I had no problem saying, "I'm sorry I haven't found a clearer way to say this but I'm not interested and you need to back off, because NO, I can't be TALKED INTO changing my mind. That's not how it works. Good night." So don't feel so mean.
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