Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Juror #9
When the summons came, I was beside myself with excitement.
Visions of courtroom dramas swam through my nineteen-year-old head and I imagined finding myself on a Very Important Jury for a Very Important Trial.
Everyone warned that I'd probably be excused, as most cases settle or get continued before seeing the light of a courtroom.
But I knew. I knew this was going to happen. This was my moment. And I was excited, dressing with care as I prepared to go all the way downtown (a mile and a half from home) to the Civic Center to assemble in the Jury Room. My questionnaire was meticulously completed. I turned it in and took a seat.
I was ready.
After an hour of waiting, watching a movie about the Importance of Jury Service, and avoiding a really flirty creeper that gave me the creeps, we were called into the courtroom and asked to sit in the audience. The judge and the lawyers and the defendant and clerk were all assembled, ready to begin the process.
First, they excused everyone who had good excuses. Some guy who ran a construction company and couldn't possibly take three or four days away from his booming business. A woman who was leaving the next day on a vacation to the Bahamas and had brought her plane tickets to prove it. Someone who didn't speak much English and a student who had forgotten to request a later date.
They began seating jurors. One by one, filling all the seats until there were 12. The questions began and two or three were excused for various reasons that had to do with them being the wrong fit for this kind of trial. More names were called. More people were excused.
And then it happened.
They called my name.
I was shaking a little as I walked forward and took my seat in the ninth spot and waited for the judge to ask me the pre-selected questions. Yes, my name is Karen. No, this service will not interfere with my work schedule. No, I've never served on a jury before. No, I don't believe everyone who is arrested is automatically guilty.
The attorneys resumed their questioning, too, looking for reasons to excuse jurors for cause, and carefully selecting the best use of the peremptory challenges.
(Look at me using all this legal jargon. I totally should have gone to law school.)
Creepy McCreeperson managed to get called up and I suddenly wanted to ask to be excused. I had no interest in being locked in a room with this guy for the next four days or so. There was just something about him that wasn't right.
I was more than a little relieved when the prosecutor had him excused after he admitted to being in multiple violent altercations with a former employer.
The voir/dire process wore on and in the end, twelve jurors and two alternates were selected and sworn in. I kept my seat and was thereafter known as Juror #9.
The trial was projected to last four days, start to finish.
The only charge the defendant faced was Resisting Arrest.
There had been a demolition derby at the local fairgrounds and police were tasked with escorting anyone to the exit that had been drinking too much. And the defendant was one that was asked to leave for rowdy, drunken behavior. Only he refused to go because he didn't think he was drunk and decided the officer was harassing him.
The prosecutor presented three witnesses. The arresting officer, and two others who had come in to help when the scuffle got out of hand and demanded pepper spray. They all told basically the same story. But not in a coerced, brothers-sticking-together sort of a way. It was in a this-is-how-it-really-went-down way.
And then the defense attorney decided to introduce his theory of what REALLY happened.
He started on the third day. And he rested on the seventh.
And for those four days of testimony, he introduced a riveting tale about a girlfriend and the cop who loved her.
Basically, his story was this. The arresting officer (whose name I can't remember so I'll just call him Officer Bob) had been on patrol in the Town Square shopping center over Christmas.
The defendant's girlfriend (we'll call her Buffy) worked in her mother's boutique in the Town Square shopping center.
One night, Buffy was locking up the store to head home when Officer Bob happened by, checking in on all the shop owners to make sure they weren't being bothered by local hooligans. He and Buffy got to talking (or, as the defense attorney claimed, flirting). She started asking him to show her the inside of his police car and yada yada yada.
So then, seven months later at the demolition derby, Officer Bob saw the defendant and Buffy and got insanely jealous and decided to arrest her boyfriend to show off how manly he was, and to win her heart.
The heart of a young woman he hadn't seen or made any attempt at contacting in seven months.
On the seventh day of the four day trial, the lawyers offered their summations. The prosecutor wrapped it all up pretty nicely. Explained reasonable doubt. Reminded us of the consistency of the officers' testimony and the fact that none of them had ever been disciplined for anything.
The defense attorney summarized his case by trying to paint Officer Bob as sort of a shifty, creepy guy who was so beloved by his fellow officers that they would willingly lie for him. He had been so attracted to Buffy that he'd completely forgotten all about his wife and kids at home.
Oh, and then the attorney tore up a copy of the US Constitution and said that if we convicted his client (of resisting arrest at a demolition derby) we were, in effect, tearing up the Constitution ourselves.
We were taken to the jury room not long after that and selected a foreman. We took a vote and I was shocked to learn that there were three jurors that were undecided on the guilt or innocence of the defendant.
Seriously?
They had their reasons. Police officers lie. Buffy really IS a cute girl. The defendant looks like kind of a douche, but that doesn't mean he deserved to be pepper sprayed.
Ugh.
We had to come back the next day to continue our deliberations.
Three hours into Day 8, we FINALLY convicted the guy.
And just what was his big sentence for this eight day trial?
A year of anger management classes.
God bless the American legal system.
And the taxpayers who fund it.
You are awesome. And if you share this post, you'll be even awesomer!
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How hilarious!
ReplyDeleteHey, I teach anger management and I fix every kid. They are all amazing citizens now.
ReplyDeletehaha, I've never done jury duty and I'm sure I'd never make it to the jury because I'd say something wrong and get put in jail or something. haha. yeah, I'm not very court room smart. Sounds like you had a worthwhile time as jury @9
ReplyDeleteWhat the???? Wait...I thought you weren't chosen for jury duty? Oh, never mind...I just saw the tag. Is it April 1st???
ReplyDeleteHey, I'd STILL be in there on the side of the bad guy. Those darn womanizing cops and their Buffy-ish gal pals!
ReplyDeleteI have always wanted to serve on a jury and have never been called. So jealous! Sounds like such a great experience, Buffy or no Buffy!
(And thanks for the e-mail tonight.)
My uncle was murdered when I was 13 and the trial was such a joke that I swore I'd never serve. But since I have a 'hardship' (disability), I don't have to serve anyway. It's a good thing for the judicial system because I wouldn't go quietly. : P
ReplyDeleteOn the plus side, you got to be part of the courtroom drama :)
ReplyDeleteUnbelievable!
ReplyDeleteI hope that I never have to do jury duty. I guess it would be fine, if I wasn't already so busy. But just the possibility stresses me out.
Jeesh! What a waste of time and money!!! But it makes for a great blog post!! :)
ReplyDeleteWow that really does seem like a waste of time and money - I do have to say I am totally jealous though I would LOVE to be called for jury duty!!!
ReplyDeleteUgh, I've never had it but was summoned once. I was out of the country!
ReplyDeleteUgh, what a complete waste of your time and taxpayer money.
ReplyDeleteBut you gotta admit...it did make for a juicy blog post!!!
Oh holy yuck! I had a case once that I sat on all day and at the end the judge came into the jury room and said, "Folks, I've been doin' this for 45 years and I've never had to do this before, but I dismiss this case. It's stupid."
ReplyDeleteGAH.
I love that you get excited about jury duty. Aaron likes it too:-)
ReplyDeleteI want to get called for jury duty! I've never been called!
ReplyDeleteI love the way you tell stories. Anger management classes? THAT'S IT?
We may have the best justice system in the world, but it is not perfect. Casey Anthony...need I say more?
ReplyDeleteAt least it sounds as though it was an interesting case.. I've only been called once and was excused because I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't too upset about it :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I love the way you weave your tales :)
ReplyDeleteI got called, but I was almost 9 months pregnant so I was so hapyp to be let go. Otherwise, I think it would be pretty cool.
ReplyDeleteThat's definitely one of those "the truth is stranger than fiction" situations. And I'm a little bit mad about the time and expense for this nonsense when real criminals are getting away with stuff.
ReplyDeleteO.M.G. That’s ridiculous! I can’t believe how far-fetched his story was. Sounds like a TV show! I’ve always wanted to be on a jury. I was a criminal defense paralegal before a stay at home mom, so I don’t think it’s ever going to happen for me.
ReplyDelete